By yourself, it is the most valuable thing

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Figure / Mona Lisa Smile


Everyone could be confused and helpless. As long as you have noticed, it is not difficult to find that various kinds of help information can be sought from time to time on the Internet and in real life. Sometimes ourselves also need help.

It is certainly not a bad thing to ask for help. When we are confused, if someone gives us some guidance, which can often let us go a lot less detours, but it is like the writer Sanmao’s reply to a confused girl:

“Anyway, it’s not the same in essence that someone tells you something or you’re going to understand it. Knowing that you come from the inside, when you understand it, without having to be guided by others, understand that nobody but only you can find the path to life for you.”

Knowing the answer is not the same as understanding yourself, but in the end, people can only rely on themselves.

Because others may be able to provide you with a thousand help, countless suggestions, but if you don’t really understand it, you will not want to change, or change it will not correct it, not completely, can not insist, the result is naturally “I have heard a lot of truth but still have a bad life.”


Higashino Keigo even said in the “Grocer’s grocery store” by using the mouth of a grocery store’s grandfather. “In fact, all the people who are struggling to make a choice already have their answers. They only want to get the choice they want. The final so-called fate is still coming out step by step.”

The answer is in our mind, and we probably don’t really need other people’s advice. Spielberg, a famous Hollywood director, also has, to some extent, confirmed this in a commencement speech at the Harvard University.

He said that when he dropped out of school, although he knew what he wanted to do, he didn’t know who he was at the beginning.

“How could I know? No one of us knows it because in the first 25 years of life, we were trained to listen to the voices of people other than ourselves. Parents and professors put wisdom and information into our The head, and later the employer and the mentor, explain to us what the world is all about.”

The voices of these authoritative figures often make us unable to refute and unknowingly reconcile, but sometimes we feel that it is not quite right, but we dare not to rebel.

Therefore, Spielberg cautioned not to be swayed by convenience and self-interest, to listen to his own inner whispers, to follow his instincts, and to brave himself.


However, not everyone is as wise as Spielberg can penetrate this fog to find the true self. Ordinary as we often wander around in confusion, we must not end it all. Even we may not know that we are confused.

We think that we are doing very well. In fact, it may be because we are narrow in our eyes and cannot see a bigger world. We do not know that we have more possibilities.

In the movie “Mona Lisa Smile,” the Wesley Women’s College’s female students are such a group of girls who were taught and kept in captivity. All of them have a good family background, diligence and pride, and they are very sure about their choice and future life.

However, their education does not teach them how to think, but just let them know what is the correct answer. They are clever but lack wisdom and insights. The purpose of study is nothing more than to marry a good husband and be a good wife, and their mothers, grandmothers, etc. do the same.

It is not that there is something wrong with the pursuit of love and marriage. Instead, the new teacher of fine art history played by Julia Roberts makes these female students understand that in addition to love and marriage, life should also boldly seek out their own lives and expand themselves.

Roberts is open-minded and encourages students to think freely. Under her guidance, the students gradually got their own ideas and even began to resist the so-called rational arrangements:

Connie bravely rushed into the strict school of boys to compound with her boyfriend;

Betty decided to divorce her derailed husband and go to Greenwich Village…

If Roberts were not to project a light to their world, they would not even know that they were in darkness. I am afraid that they would not break the rules, let alone go there.


And after all, all this ultimately depends on oneself.

For example, Connie and Betty changed because they were willing to change from the heart, and teachers cannot and do not have the power to make them change.

There is also an important role in the play, Joan, who is the best of this group. With the help of the teacher, she received a notice of admission to Yale University. However, she eventually chose to give up. She felt that her marriage was the last thing she could not give up.

It is not only the choice of studies, and the renunciation of marriage is the pursuit of true self. Many people think that this is Joan’s own choice and it is understandable.

This view can not be said to be wrong, but obviously can be equal to love and schooling, but she was only focused on love, how many people regret:

Isn’t it a waste for a person not to use his talent and energy to the fullest?

Therefore, we must not only rely on ourselves, but also continue to break ourselves.

For example, contact with new things, make new teachers and friends, let them take themselves to find new possibilities;

For example, continuous learning, charging, training new skills, make themselves more competitive;

For example, occasionally deviate from the “normal” track and do something that your teachers, parents, and buddies will never do…

And keep in mind that instead of letting poverty limit your imagination, don’t let the rich and comfortable life blind your eyes.

People can change and become better, and better yourself will be more worth relying on.

From now on, don’t follow the instructions of others. Thinking, listening to your heart, distinguishing right from wrong, conscientiously doing what you wants to do, even if faced with major setbacks, it is not to give up, to be tough, pragmatic, and courageous to step out of your own life.

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